How to absolutely, positively ensure that you do not get picked to speak at Ignite Portland

Description

Every Ignite Portland presentation is followed by a mad rush of excited presentation proposals. The writers of these proposals often submit them without fully considering the consequences if they should choose to be picked as a presenter- and many presenters spend weeks in anguish and misery wishing they had not pushed “send.” These people simply do not appreciate that it is possible to use the inherent rules of Ignite Portland to absolutely ensure rejection as a presenter. By following this advice, you will be able to submit whatever cockamamy presentation you want to Ignite Portland with no fear that there is any chance whatsoever for it to actually get accepted.

John Metta

Affiliation World Domination Industries, Incorporated
Website http://positorio.us/
Biography

Blithering Idiot